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On good days, I feel pretty great about myself. Often it’s because things are going my way; my hair is working, my skin is clear; I’ve had personal victories in work and in life. I jump out of bed feeling excited to face the world.
On other days I’m constantly turning my shoulder. Did anyone notice those gray hairs that get seemingly more pronounced each week, or hear me say or write something idiotic, or see how I completely blew up at my kids?
Ah yes, and being a mom adds a whole new dimension to insecurity. We’ve all been that lady in the grocery store with the shrieking, out-of-control toddler at some point or another. Maybe others are judging, maybe they’re feeling sorry for us—either way, it’s the type of attention we don’t like.
“Insecurity” is a monster issue with women. It’s almost too large to tackle with a single blog post. But I’ll put it out there anyway because I know that when left unchecked, it can cripple us—in our faith, our work and our relationships. It manifests in different ways as we compensate for perceived weaknesses in ourselves. Maybe you relate to one or more of the following forms of insecurity:
- Retrospective broken record: “What if I said that wrong? What are they going to think about me?” You can’t sleep while analyzing conversations of the day.
- Aesthetic obsession: “If I could just get that strand of hair to fall in the exact spot it should, I will feel great about how I look today.” You give up after your 9,465th stop in front of the mirror. You might also obsess over the way your kids or husband look.
- Paralysis by analysis: “…Ummm…” You can’t speak or make a decision because you’re afraid you’re going to mess it up. Failure is terrifying.
- Comparison trap: “If only I had her boots/legs/confidence/perfect kids/marriage/money/etc.” The way you define your worth is by measuring yourself and your family up to other women and their families.
At times, I am guilty of all succumbing to all of these, and more. I like to think that I do it less as I grow older and more mature, but unfortunately I don’t think I will ever completely “outrun” insecurity. With new stages in life come new fears and unknowns—all of which I can feel freshly insecure about.
One of my favorite books about the topic of insecurity is Secure in Heart, by my dear friend Robin Weidner. I read it as a newlywed and then I read it again recently (different stages of life, different insecurities!). What insecurity boils down to is this: you’re either choosing to believe what is true, or you’re choosing to believe what is false. What is true comes from God, and what is not comes from the enemy. It’s that simple.
What’s not so simple is rewiring your brain so that it lands on what is true rather than what isn’t. That takes practice.
But it starts right in scripture. If you’re having one of “those days” when you’re just not feeling your worth, start here to know what the truth is. There are Bible verses about insecurity throughout the Scriptures; these are just a few of my favorites that keep me grounded when I’m tempted to believe what is false. (All verses NIV unless otherwise noted.)
10 Bible Verses about Insecurity for Moms
You Are Enough
As a parent, wife, Christian and general human being, I am constantly battling with the question, “Am I doing enough?” These verses help me remember to focus less on what I can accomplish, and more on who I am and what I’ve been given through Christ.
1 John 3:1
See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!
This is an encouraging verse because it reminds me that God looks at me the way at I look at my own children: with love that is overflowing no matter what.
2 Peter 1:3
His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.
When I’m caught up in “need to do more” thinking, I recall that I already have everything I need to live a godly life of growth and grace.
Your True Strength
When I’m feeling insecure, more often than not I’m trying to gauge my worth through my own strength. I forget that the source of my true strength is limitless. I’m not a super hero, but there’s Someone much stronger than me who has my back.
2 Timothy 1:7
For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.
Raise your hand if you ever feel timid! Uh, yeah, like whenever I have to take responsibility as an adult. But if I approach my daily decisions prayerfully and in tune with God’s Spirit, I don’t have to be afraid.
Yes, my soul, find rest in God;
my hope comes from him.
Truly he is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
This is one of my favorite passages when I’m feeling overwhelmed, discouraged and like a complete failure. When everything is stripped away, I have only one place to stand on—the best place.
The Lord is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?
When the wicked advance against me
to devour me,
it is my enemies and my foes
who will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then I will be confident.
Insecurity and fear are closely related emotions. When I’m feeling insecure, I’m often afraid of failure of disapproval. But when my mindset is that God is the light of my light, none of those feelings are grounded.
You make your saving help my shield,
and your right hand sustains me;
your help has made me great.
I do not make myself great by any stretch of the imagination; only God does. And wow, he does a smashing job.
I can do all things through him who strengthens me. (ESV)
Did you catch how it says “all things” (including parenting), rather than “just a few things”? If I’m called to do it, he will pull me through.
Your True Beauty
I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I revert to my inner junior high self on occasion…and yes it gets worse as I get older. Ugh. Pregnancy was not kind to much of my body. So that’s why I need to know these truths:
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
He made me wonderfully and that will never change no matter how old I get!
1 Peter 3:3–5
Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves…
So if I’m understanding this correctly, beauty comes from my “inner self,” which is hopefully getting more beautiful even though the outside is…well, you know.
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Amen to that! This passage is about the ultimately beautiful wife: not the magazine cover model, but the one who is scraping boogers off her shirt because she is to devoted to loving her family. (Wiping noses is for Jesus is legit!) Check out my devotional on Proverbs 31 for more on this topic.
Want to keep these verses handy? You can now download them in a printable form! Just click below:
Now it’s your turn: what do you get insecure about as a mom (or human)? Do you have any favorite Bible verses about insecurity? Scroll down and leave a comment!
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